Favouritism, preference, bias ...
- Apr 2
- 8 min read
"people usually see what they're already looking for, that's all.”
Veronica Roth
I have spent a large chunk of today and a bit of yesterday trying to decide what to cook for a lunch with our friends on Friday. (Actually on Tuesday and Wednesday - it's now Thursday.
To me this is a pleasure, but it's also increasingly difficult. I mean where to begin? As you know I have masses of cookbooks, there are the supermarket magazines once a month and there is, of course, always the internet. There are literally millions of recipes out there to choose from. And yes, when I'm cooking for somebody else for a special or semi-special occasion I always work from recipes. It's a chance to try something new. Like the way I choose 'my' book for my two book groups - something I fancy, that I haven't read before.
Once upon a time when I had fewer cookbooks and the internet did not exist - nor the supermarket magazines either - although there were the women's magazines - I would generally either commit to one main dish and then build around it or go for a theme of some kind. Like I vaguely remember cooking a Polish meal once, and there was definitely a curry party - maybe for David's 40th. And on that last one - back then I had fewer choices of curry recipes and so it was easier to choose - virtually all of them were from Charmaine's book on Indian food I seem to remember. I did not know about Madhur Jaffrey back then, and all those other countries with curry like dishes were as yet unknown to me. Today it wouldn't be so simple. Besides, though Roghan Josh or Chicken Korma might be favourites today I would probably try to find something I hadn't cooked before. Even, perhaps something vaguely experimental. The Indian diaspora has changed the face of Indian food in the world today.
But I digress.
This time, however, I was out of ideas for themes or starting points, and so fell into the usual trap of fixing on a particular recipe writer. And as you well know, at this moment in my life it's usually a choice between Nigel and Ottolenghi. Having decided that I had recently 'done' Nigel I decided to go for Ottolenghi - well Ottolenghi and his crew and their more recent books.
Well you have to narrow it down somehow don't you? But, yes it's definitely favouritism - in the sense of these two being my current favourites. Although 'Ottolenghi' now includes all of his crew - current and past. Doubtless this will change at some point, because I have been an equally avid admirer of others in the past - Robert Carrier, Elizabeth David, Claudia Roden, Delia Smith, Beverley Sutherland Smith ... - and I do return to these, and all the others who have waxed and waned in my favourites list over time. Maybe these current favourites will meet the same fate.
Another thing that has changed over time of course, is pictures. In the past there were none - or very few, then there were a few more, but of varying quality and certainly not of every recipe in a book. Which didn't stop me choosing something without a picture. Today, however, I do indeed rely on pictures - a shortcoming I know. But it's a filter I guess. I flicked through my chosen small stack of books stopping at pictures that caught my eye. Those thus selected would then go through a reading process which filtered some out - too much chilli, too hard, took too long, can't get an ingredient ... and perhaps most importantly would the recipe also please my guests? For when we are cooking we need to consider others.
It doesn't matter at all what we favour in terms of books, paintings, films and suchlike. It matters a little more about things to do and places to go - unless one is going or doing on one's own. But when it comes to cooking food we are mostly cooking for others and their likes and dislikes, and our own are not crucial to the choice. Considering who you are cooking for is a useful filter, sometimes difficult - food allergies, diets and phobias and the like, sometimes just annoying - David doesn't like prawns ... but sometimes useful in that it's a challenge - vegan - which is always stimulating, and also narrows the field of exploration.
"There are as many preferences as there are men." said Horace back in Roman times, and I do think he meant just men. Women's preferences did not need to be considered at all. Nevertheless all those different preferences just makes it all so much more difficult.
So what is favouritism or a favourite? "[A] person or thing regarded with especial liking," says Etymonline - a liking that is "based on personal relationships, shared identity, or subjective preference, rather than on impersonal, objective criteria." said somebody else. Alas I didn't note who. And when I looked for appropriate quotes as a header or which said something relevant, what I mostly found was negative - in the sense of favouritism being nepotism in politics, or business mostly. Hardly anybody seemed to consider it in a meaningful and/or more positive wa - why we preferred some things over others. And even for the very few quotes that I found about the concept of favouritism or preference, there was negativity - e.g.:
"PREFERENCE, n. A sentiment, or frame of mind, induced by the erroneous belief that one thing is better than another. " Ambrose Bierce
Which I suppose is true, but it's a somewhat arrogant, denigrating way of saying it isn't it? I think Bierce was just being superciliously clever. Not that we necessarily know why we all like - love even - different things and different people. Of course it's because we are all different but what it is it in us that makes us prefer one thing or person over another? Maybe as one Laurell K. Hamilton said: "you like what you like. Most of the time you have no clue why."
Enough of trying to understand how we choose what to cook for dinner in a pretentious - yes pretentious I fear - way. So what did I choose and why?
My starter - Grilled bread with tomato and fried garlic. From the OTK book Shelf Love, and, I think, Noor Murad. I have made this before to great acclaim. I was told the fried garlic was particularly good. The actual recipe is not online, just a fairly detailed description. It is also very simple. You grill the bread, grill some cherry tomatoes, grate some tomatoes and strain, mixing the remains with garlic, oil, red wine vinegar and chilli flakes plus salt and pepper. Fry the sliced garlic and then assemble - toast, tomato mix, grilled tomatoes, herbs and garlic and the mandatory drizzle of olive oil. A kind of bruschetta or pan con tomate. Yum.
I saw various other very tempting little pastries, but in the end decided, for once, on the tried and true, rather the new and adventurous - mostly because it was quick and easy I think. MInd you the price of tomatoes at the moment is horrific. David attempted to stop me buying them! And I would have if it was just for me. But this is a treat.
My chosen main dish is from another Ottolenghi disciple - Ixta Belfrage and her book Fusão - Chicken, bacon and spring onion skewers with stroganoff sauce - alas the recipe is not online. It also seemed pretty simple. Here I decided to go for the British labelled streaky bacon - which was fortunately on a special, and much to my personal shame some frozen french fries. For she serves hers with Brazilian string fries. I did consider doing this myself but decided there would be too much fuss and bother and too much potential smoke and smell as I cooked them. Not to mention the faff of cutting the potatoes that thin - even with the help of a mandoline. So I'm telling myself the frozen ones are an experiment. and I shouldn't be a snob. This dish was chosen after consulting with David. As I said, when doing this kind of cooking you are cooking for others, and he had some minor misgivings about my other candidates.
I actually had half a dozen or so recipes to choose from here and I think four of them were from Ixta - the chosen one; Poached fish in a charred tomato broth which I have made before which is a variation of the Italian Aqua Pazza - David didn't fancy fish - he's not a fan -even though when we did first have this he pronounced it 5 star; Chicken with mango and urucum - for urucum substitute paprika and black peppercorns she says - and alas the recipe is not online Slow-cooked pineapple pork with green vinagrete which Sainsbury's have featured - the last two being rejected by David because of the fruit component:
There were also a couple of Ottolenghi choices - Stroganoff meatballs and Shawarma meatloaf with caramelised onions, which David rejected because of the pomegranates and I rejected because of the caramelised onions which are a mild dietary problem for one of my friends. I can't quite remember but I think the meatballs were rejected as ordinary? I would note that several people online have made this dish and pronounced it delicious. And anyway we are doing stroganoff - well not really - the Ixta way. No mushrooms for her.
I should also say, that with respect to David's likes and dislikes, and minor unease at the unknown, I would have resisted or ignored if I had really, really thought any of his rejections was the one to go for. In this case I did not mind.
Having decided on the chicken skewers, I then decided to make Noor Murad's Grilled green beans with lemon and feta - as featured on the Homes and Gardens website, rather than good old green salad as a side, which although lovely is perhaps a bit boring. Although I could serve it with the following cheese course. I'm still not quite sure whether this is a cold or warm salad, or meant to be served more or less straight away. So I haven't launched into making it the day before. I suspect it will be better for being made just a short time before serving. My choice alone this one.
So yes, I have favoured the Ottolenghi team. And I do continue to admire their work immensely. There is a new book coming out in September. I do try - every now and then - to either go back to my oldtime gurus, or to try somebody new and indeed possibly somebody else will come along who will blow us all away. Favourites tend not to last. In the bad old days when they fell out of favour they might have had their heads chopped off. The fall tended to be somewhat drastic anyway. For me I think the relationship just becomes less intense. None of my old favourites have ended up in the street library or op shop.
I will end with some positive words, from A.A. Milne who may not have done the right thing by his young son, but left us with many soothing words with which to confront the world:
“Any day spent with you is my favourite day. So today is my new favourite day.” A.A. Milne
YEARS GONE BY
April 2
2023 - Parasoupa me avgolemono
2022 - Nothing
2021 - Missing
2020 - Nothing
2019 - Eating well locally
2017 - Destination dining
It ws all deilicious as expected! 😜!